http://www.knoxnews.com/news/2008/dec/29/tva-not-holding-its-head-high/
http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/12/29/tennessee.sludge/
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/30/us/30sludge.html

“Last week a man-made pond used by the Tennessee Valley Authority in Kingston, TN to house coal plant by-product breached. The sludge from the spill contaminated the Clinch and Emory rivers, destroyed homes, and made the land in the surrounding area toxic.”

Summiteers,

The Tennessee Valley Authority is in serious trouble. The T.V.A. has seriously damaged property in the area and has had a serious impact on the environment by spreading their sludge all over the Emory and Clinch rivers. An ecosystem has been destroyed and millions of acres of precious wildlife will never be the same. In fact, the water in the area is so polluted that people are advised not to touch it or the dead fish floating on the surface.

Photo courtesy of United Mountain Defense blog

Listen up T.V.A., the time and money that you will need to decontaminate the environment and to repair the private and public property could make you go bankrupt. Good luck T.V.A., you are going to need all the help you can get. Let’s consider the following solution your first consultation. Don’t worry, there is no charge. This one is on the house.

Any good strategist knows when to call it quits, and that is exactly what I recommend you do with this problem. Let’s face it, after the sludge hit that water Mother Nature decided to take a permanent vacation. The land will never recover, it is wasted. Now listen T.V.A., start off by taking all the sludge you can easily pull from the area and quickly boiling the water away from it. Okay…then you need to start a controlled burn of the remaining sludge. This burn will rip the land back to its barren roots and reinvigorate the soil, making it fertile again. Still with me T.V.A.? Next, you need to make a hard-packed, non-porous layer out of cement and the dry ash mixture. Spread that creamy cement layer over the entire spill-zone and make a public landfill out of it. True, you will have to buy all of the private property destroyed by your sludge, but over time you can make the money back by allowing garbage to pile up on the new landfill. Before you know it, that pile of garbage will turn into a pile of cash in the hands of the T.V.A.

Problem solved. You’re welcome T.V.A. Now you’re probably thinking, “But Scott, what about the future sludge produced by T.V.A. Plants?” The best solution is to market the sludge for what it really is: a condensed mass of valuable elements and natural resources. The sludge’s lead and mercury can be sold to the scientific community and the arsenic can be used to make bug spray and rat poison. T.V.A., the positive spin on this situation has been laid out in front of you. Just give me a call at 888-414-3083 if you want to sign up for another consultation.

Stay on top,

Scott Summit

DBNR

What do you think T.V.A. should do with the wasted land? Comment and discuss on Scott Summit’s Virtual Roundtable.